Today you feel stressed. Today everything is too much and you just want to crawl under the covers and stay in bed all day.
You tried that a few times. Unfortunately, you can’t fall asleep.
Your brain keeps spinning with everything — all of the things that you need to do, all of things you have done, all of the unexpected changes and frustrations, all of the deadlines and demands.
And don’t forget you’re sick. And that you’ve only NOT been sick for 10 days of the past 40 days. So you’re a bit worn out.
And look at you! You have gone back to bed the past two mornings to sleep because you knew you were getting sick again and you didn’t want to get worse by pushing yourself to get up and go full tilt from 7am onward. And so far you’re not anymore sick. Well done.
And look at you, as well! You’re aware that your natural propensity to bitterness and blame when you get stressed may have been starting up when you realized how difficult one of your assignments is going to be and how very little instruction was given. Yes, Bitter Betty wants to come over and play today. But you recognize that Bitter Betty only yammers on when you are stressed and that you don’t have to play that game.
Bitter Betty also likes to catch up with Dame Blame, and Dame Blame likes to uncover all of those parts of your life that aren’t going *exactly* how they should be and then she sends you on a rampage of frustration where you try to fix everything in a panic, leaving a war path of nasty demands in your wake.
But you also recognized that it was Dame Blame at the door, and you opened it only a crack and then shut it again. Because you knew letting her in wouldn’t make you or your situation any better.
So, dear Dixie. What are you doing to do on this day? This day when you’re tired and suddenly on the verge of frazzled but there are many thing to be done? And just thinking about those things makes you want to run and hide and fantasize that none of its real. Ie., that the five girls coming to the sleepover birthday party tomorrow are actually coming to a house where a hazmat suit is not needed to go from the front door to the basement? What do you do?
Well… you start by what you just did. Talking to yourself. And being aware of all of these crazy feelings you’re experiencing. Naming them. Having compassion for them and for yourself. And then. Stay in bed if you need to. But just for a bit. Then get up and do what you can. And let “what you can” be enough.
(That’s what I’d tell myself if I were my own therapist, anyway…)